HELP! How do I woo a Greek God?

HELP! How do I woo a Greek God?

Dear Greek Oracle,

A new man has started working in my office. He happens to be Greek. He also happens to be devilishly handsome! How do I go about wooing said Greek God in a professional environment without making myself look like a fool? What is the best way to a Greek man’s heart?

From Gina*

(*Names have been changed to protect identities)

* * *

Dear Gina,

I suggest the food approach. To most Greek men, a woman’s place is in the kitchen and if you can find the key to his stomach, you will have no problem winning the key to his heart.

As you are in a professional environment, it is vital that you don’t come across too strong in front of your colleagues.

Start off by bringing in the odd cake for the office to share – the Greek God will be sure to notice (check if he has any allergies first) and he will soon start to expect these little treats everyday.

At some point you must then stop bringing in food. You can fob your colleagues off with some excuse that you have been too busy, but to the Greek man you could say that you’ve had lots of friends requesting you cook for them, and just haven’t had time to make something for the office.

He will immediately become jealous, and will no doubt ask why you don’t cook for him. SUCCESS! You can then innocently claim that you are preparing to cook a moussaka/ galaktoboureko / something vaguely Greek on Friday night, and he can come over and ‘help himself’ if he likes.

If he says yes, you’re IN. If he says no, you haven’t made a fool of yourself as HE is the one who has asked you why you don’t cook for him, and you have simply made a friendly offer.

Obviously, if you don’t like to cook/can’t cook, all of the above could be a problem. However, M&S do some great pre-cooked meals and cakes that you can pretend are your own. Food is food to a Greek man, whoever cooked it!

If the food approach doesn’t work for you, alternative wooing methods could involve:

  • Listening intently to his every word and inflating his ego at every opportunity
  • Making a fuss over him if he has a cold / is ‘ill’
  • Dressing well but not too provocatively
  • Drawing attention to yourself in a positive way e.g. get colleagues on your side and have them mention your name and all your strengths frequently
  • Sending a bouquet of flowers to yourself and claiming that you have no idea who they are from

While it is vital to show your caring, ‘wifely’ side, you should also not fail to show your independence and some interest in other colleagues – a Greek man is fiercely competitive and will relish a challenge – winning is everything.

For more information you may want to refer to this post:

Fifty ways to make a Greek man happy!

May the Gods be with you.

The Greek Oracle

xoxo

If YOU have a Big Fat Greek problem (no matter how not-so-fat) then contact thegreekoracle@hotmail.co.uk

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